Sunday, July 05, 2009

Montana and North Dakota facing expulsion from the United States?


President Obama and Vice President Biden plan to convene a White House "fiscal irresponsibility" summit on Monday, July 20, with its intended purpose to launch a national conversation, the results of which will hopefully pressure the fiscally responsible states of Montana and North Dakota to get in lock step with the other states of the nation and practice national fiscal irresponsibility.

Montana and North Dakota senators are conspicuously missing from the list of 96 senators who have been invited by the White House to attend the summit along with economists, policy specialists and special interest group representatives.

One Montana representative, speaking on condition of anonymity, expressed grave concern this intentional snub of Montana and neighboring North Dakota's invitation to attend this unusual and rarest of high level White House summits may signal dire consequences for the two fiscally responsible states. "There are rumors," he said, "that this may be a prelude to the expulsion of Montana and North Dakota from the Union."

An Obama spokesman said, "Societally, forty-eight states, as led by California's blue-ribbon example of political, economic and social irresponsibility with its resultant total collapse, are the gleaming examples of the model for successful capitalism. Everybody in those states is living for today.

"Unfortunately, there exists two rogue states that are taking steps to create a better tomorrow for themselves, and this was never the intention of a free capitalistic society. It sets the wrong example," said David Wilkerson, former comptroller and CEO of the Foundation for Federal Fiscal Irresponsibility.

President Obama, overwhelmed by both short- and long-term economic responses by the states in support of capitalism and its march toward a complete economic meltdown, is not expected to go easy on Montana and North Dakota.

"We are a Union of fifty states," he sternly reminded, "united with a long history of purpose and vision. There IS no room for division by rogue states who refuse to act irresponsibly in unison with the rest of the nation. By acting divisively, they are a weight on the growth of our burgeoning national debt -- an act I consider nothing short of seditious. The fiscal responsibility being demonstrated by Montana and North Dakota is a mutinous act against an otherwise cohesive and united America," Obama warned.

Experts concerned over Obama's strong language are worried should the summit ultimately result in articles for expulsion of Montana and North Dakota from the Union.

"We all know what happened the last time states voluntarily tried to secede from the United States. But we don't know what would happen if states were to leave by forced secessions," one historian worried nervously out loud.


New Old Glory sans Montana
and North Dakota?

6 comments:

Fran said...

Hey! Wait a minute... SOUTH Dakota IS mismanaging money & NORTH Dakota is not.
Looks like you've got your Dakota's mixed up.

But hey if they can't mismanage money, they must be un-american. Overspending & debt are patriotic.

Border Explorer said...

I wonder if we can convince Gov. Rick Perry to take over the state leadership in one of these two states (thereby getting his sorry behind out of TX)? He seems to WANT to secede; it's a marriage made in heaven!

a ball of Light said...

Don't Snatch South Dakota! Save Sturgis!

maybe the other 47 states (NM will be neutral territory) could convince MT & ND (per the map) as they are pushed out of the United BanksterStates of America (UBSA) to be a black rendition site. if we could keep Cheney in MT and Perry would take SD (and hopefully lure Shrub & daddy out of TX) then the Faux Infotainment Network will sycophantically follow the scent of it's (barely) betters to their compounds.

Trouble is that damn fence shrub etal built will have to get moved 1500 miles North! Probably not a problem if you were to offer mortgage forgiveness to all foreclosurees who took part of the fence northwards. It might only take a week to move it! Once finished, however, the roundup and drop off (at cruise missile altitude) of the remainder of the shrub infestation could take place at a more leisurely pace.

I guess that means i'll have to find an alternate route to the Calgary Stampede.

Dada said...

Well, was this Dada's last blog? Where the hell's my Editor Sam these days? (obsessing over a young batch of feral kittens in yard behind his, obviously)

First of all, shame on you all! Everyone knows South Dakota is North of North Dakota, don't they? (B.E., I chose to lump you in with Fran and abol for NOT reminding me -- too kind (?), or just oppsolexic like me? [grin])

I didn't even see your comment, Fran, the first to warn of my error, until today, meaning playing the role of North Dakota was S. Dakota for more than a day. That's a long time for one to go globally with egg on one's face. And thanks abol for being even gentler in reminding of my mistake.

Obviously, Dada can't complete a blog -- much less paragraphs or sentences -- w/o screwing 'em up it would seem.

Here's how it really 'came down.' This blog, which started out with Montana, Mrs. dada was quick to point out whilst doing Sam's job, had become MINNESOTA (!) as I typed this (and POSTED it!). Hence, we became so occupied with correcting my error (I had started thinking of Minnesota when preparing/typing this), replacing all MN's with MT's. BUT NEITHER ONE OF US EVEN NOTICED THE DAKOTAS. Thank you all for your gentle reminders (or, in BE's case, lack thereof, ahem)

I like the idea of isolating all miserable bastards into one area where we can keep better tabs on 'em (throw in Palin, too). But I'm against handing the reins over to Perry to screw up the budget of the new territory which would probably only result in the US welcoming him back into the fold of growing miseries.

To my mind, the salvage-ability of the country becomes more and more iffy with each passing day, so long as we have media that focus on Michael Jackson and questions the impact of a Palin and her 'going for the gold' decision on her future designs on the presidency. If Palin is still in the running for the oval office, as the media seem to ponder that she is, we are all efeing doomed. (I'm hoping she become so distracted and obsessed with her new bling from the millions being thrown at her for books and TV shows, she forget about the WH.)

I missed the network news on Honduras last eve -- so busy was I channel dodging the L.A. Jackson funeral stories. (And not to worry, after they finally plant him, we can look forward to months and months of quibbling over the estate, which should free up the US to 'have its way' with Latin America completely unnoticed).

Fran said...

I tried to find a gracious way to bring up the N vs S Dakots topic..... but apparently I am not winning awards in that department.

In the world of screw ups.... that was nothing compared, say... to the Shrub!

Dada said...

Oh no Fran, you did fine, I was sorry I didn't see your comment sooner to fix the error

(Typing this on the iPod - man, how tedious!)