Sorry, no. Actually, the hammer got my thumb. As a result, I'm not quite as keyboard verbose today as usual. And what I'm saying, I'm saying real slowly.
You see, yesterday I was a very bad carpenter. Making a minor repair on a roof beam, I accidentally slammed the hammer down on my thumb instead of the nail I was driving. Just for a moment, the pain made me think of another carpenter, Jesus Christ! And I wondered if Jesus ever hit his thumb with a hammer instead of hitting the nail on the head?
But the thumb pain was only momentary and I resumed my hammering. With extra caution. Or so I thought.
It was only minutes later I again missed the nail. This time I took out my left forefinger. After moments of cursing to myself, I noticed blood droplets staining the sidewalk below my ladder. I again thought of Jesus. Could he have been this bad as a carpenter? And, if so, did he make such pronouncements as I was now making under my breath?
I don't know about that, but the strangest thing was happening. In the extreme anguish of the moment, I was making prophecies! Yes, I declared such things as, "I'll be damned!" and "I'll be a son of a bitch!"
I hope I was wrong, but this morning I'm nervous. That's because, so far, half of yesterday's prophetic proclamations have come true.