Wednesday, June 29, 2005

The Apology

This morning there came some awful news. A local woman was found face down in a ditch, barely breathing. "Rushed to a hospital, her condition is currently unknown." I got a very uneasy feeling deep in my gut.

See? Last eve on this blog, I made a passing (tongue-in-cheek) reference to the George W. Bush Speech Drinking Game as a way to have a little fun while attending the president's more serious message of reassuring us on the war on Iraq. Suggesting you take a gulp of your favorite alcoholic beverage everytime George Bush said the word "freedom" or "democracy," I had no idea what I'd advocated. Seriously!

During the course of the president's 23 minute speech, he served up "democracy" 15 times and "freedom" a whopping 35 times! That's enough to kill even the best conditioned, most fervent alcoholic.

The apology:

I never intended anyone any harm. If you were watching George Bush last night while playing the George W. Bush Speech Drinking Game and suffered a black out resulting in brain damage or death, I apologize.

The regression:

However, just in case you didn't play and can get your hands on a video of Bush's last night speech, a friend of a friend recommended watching it, pausing it everytime the president says a "drinking word or phrase," swilling your alcohol, and then resuming the video. This will enable you to keep up with Bush. (CAUTION: Doing this could permanently damage or burn up your remote!)

The disclaimer:

Am I kidding? OF COURSE I'm kidding! As mentioned last night, I'm for responsible alcohol consumption. The George W. Bush Speech Drinking Game intended for use while watching a George W. Bush Speech is just a joke. Sadly, everything else last night was deadly serious.

4 comments:

Harrod Family History said...

Oops! I got the drinking rules wrong. I only took a drink every time Bush said 9/11. The last thing I remember was running out of the house screaming. I guess I fell into the ditch.

My doctor says I'll be okay, but I'll be on the wagon now (I'll keep the TV off when he makes speeches in the future).

Dada said...

So YOU were the lady in the ditch! Whew! Glad you'll be okay. Maybe you read the rules to the game, huh, because that's one of the drinking points. So are an audience of soldiers, "it's hard work," "stay the course," "finish the mission," and "we're winning." Those five were good for 23 hits o' the bottle last night. Strangely, people waiting for "WMD" died of thirst.

Anonymous said...

I can't drink and watch t.v. at the same time. I wouldn't even make it to the ditch (poor nona).

Harrod Family History said...

Did anyone wonder where the applause and the military "hoo yahs" were during the speech? It was unusually quiet.